listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
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I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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