so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
