I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
