How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
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