she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
This is classic penis vs brain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize