One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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