Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Randomize
