47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
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