New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Randomize
