Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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