He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize