I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i just google imaged poop.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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