Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
