i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
