Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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