So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
