Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
