i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
