I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
