My hair reeks of homosexuality.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I'm both gender and math confused
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize