You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Randomize
