did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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