I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
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Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
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They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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