i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
