She's JV to your varsity
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Randomize
