Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
You've changed since you got that strap on
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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