How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
