Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
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