I seem to have left my pride at pride
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize