I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
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