More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
