hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
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