I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
