nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
