Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
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