he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
