i permit you to call me
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
