why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
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