yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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