My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
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