Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
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