Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Randomize
