I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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