oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Randomize
