Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
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