Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
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it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
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IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
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