no, he came in my armpit
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
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