what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Randomize
