I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize
