Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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