This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
That was an excessively violent trivia night
These 21 People Came Up With Hilarious Excuses For Their Hickies
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.